Blog Post #11

My personality is definitely "special." At least I get that a lot. Sometimes I can be very goofy but I know when to be serious. I would say I'm a fun loving person and I like to have a good time. I see myself as easy to get along with. I am not quick to judge and I don't stereotype. I meet all people with an open mind. I am usually shy when I first meet people. After I get to know them, I become talkative. I am always willing to lend a hand when someone needs help, and I am a very compassionate person. I need to have a plan for everything or I just can't sleep at night. I get up and make lists which makes me a pretty organized person. My lists make me responsible and I always get my work done. Although I'm organized in that way, my room is a mess so I don't know if I can really consider myself organized. I get distracted very easily. It takes me twice as long to get a job done because I'll start to do something else. I would say my personality is mostly good and I have more good traits than bad. One of the good traits I have is I'm friendly. It is good because it makes me very easy to get along with, if you take the time to get to know me. I'm almost always nice to everyone, even when they do something wrong to me. I am an easy going person. This is good because I can go with the flow and don't object to much. It also saves a lot of arguments. I am also caring. I take the time to think about how something I do will affect the people around me. If someone has a problem or something they need to talk about I will give advice to help them. Another good trait I have is responsibility. I can be counted on to always get my work done. This is good because people can trust in me, and I won't let them down. I am a forgiving person. This is good for me and for the people who did something to me. It helps me not to hold grudges, and I get over things very easily. It helps to stop the argument with the other person, and lets us go on with our other business. One of my bad traits is I'm quiet. I'm shy when I am around new people and don't talk much. This is bad because it gives people the wrong idea about me. They may think I don't like them and it just leads to misunderstandings. Another one of my bad traits is I'm very self-conscious. I always feel like people are judging me, so I have to be perfect. This is bad because it makes me very hard on myself. Very rarely do I feel like I've done a really good job on something. Another bad trait is I'm very trusting. I trust almost everyone, and it takes a lot before I will start to not trust someone. This can be a good thing, but for me it's bad. It makes me very gullible, which isn't a very good trait. People can fool me very easily just because I think they're always telling the truth.

I am both an optimist and a pessimist, depending on the situation. When it comes to someone else, I am always optimistic and tell them they can do it. If I'm on a team, I'm always cheering on the others. I tell them we can do it and always try and bring them upif we're losing. If we're winning, I encourage them to keep going. Sometimes I am a pessimist when it comes to me though. I always think I'm going to do bad on something. I feel I could be better, look better, or have better things. I am especially pessimistic with my grades. I get good grades, but I always think I'm going to do bad on tests. Although I can be pessimistic, sometimes I'm optimistic with myself. If someone tells me I can't do something, it makes me work harder. I tell myself I can do it, and don't stop until I prove them wrong. I would say I'm optimistic more than I am pessimistic even though I do say " I can't" a lot.

My quietness is one of the traits that varies depending on the situation. When I'm with new people, I feel awkward and I don't talk much. I think I am more introverted than extroverted, but as I've gotten older I'm not quite as introverted. When I was young, I never talked. Now since I've experienced more, I am not as bad when I meet new people. I am not quiet or shy when I'm around people I know well or my friends. I am very talkative and sociable. I actually get told by teachers to be quiet. Another one of my traits that varies is being open or closed-minded. I'm open-minded most of the time. I am always interested in trying new things and having new experiences. I feel like you should try everything you can. You only have one life on earth, might as well live it up. Sometimes I am closed-minded depending on what the idea is and who it's proposed by. I am closed to experiences that would have a negative effect on my future. I have big plans for my future, and I don't want to screw them up. For that reason, sometimes I am closed-minded and I always think things through.

I use defense mechanisms all the time. They help me to cope with whatever is going on in my life. I use displacement, the expression of feelings toward a person/thing less threatening than the true target of those feelings, often. I use it when I'm really stressed out and it reduces my anxiety. When I use it, usually I'll squeeze a stress ball or hit something and it takes out my agression. Another mechanism I've used is reaction formation, or the tendency to act in a manner opposite to one's true feelings. I would do this when I was younger with my crushes. I didn't want anyone to know I liked them, so I wasn't always the nicest to them. You see this case a lot, especially in young kids and adolescents. When I see kids doing that, it reminds me about the days when all the kids my age were like that. When my sister was born I used regression. Regression is relieving anxiety by showing immature behaviors that have relieved anxiety in the past. When she was a baby, I felt like everyone only paid attention to her, so I would act like a baby to so people would pay attention to me. I was so excited when my mom was pregnant but then when my sister was born, I wanted my parents to give her away. I realize now that acting like a baby was a dumb way to get attention. I'm sure almost everyone has done something like this in their lives. I've seen both of my sisters do it and many of my friends when they're siblings were born.